Wednesday, November 23, 2005

I Believe I Have Much To Report. Please Join Me.

First, I am back from my 3 week trip to Texas. That would be a definite "Yay!".

But here's my first big piece of news: I begin doing my own shows on 12/2. Yes. I'll be doing the demo, with T.J. as my closer. No more Tommy. Positive: No more Tommy. Negative: No more funny stories about Tommy. Other positive: Possible stories of T.J. and his bowel movements behind dumpsters.

I leave for Minnesota tomorrow. Thankfully, it is not work related. Myself and my cousin, Craig, are heading down/up, wherever, to hook up with my sister.

Also, DeRex has somewhat prematurely posted his review of All That Jazz. So, that means that mine is coming soon.

Other big news: The previous movie-trivia publication I worked on is going to see a more professional printing in book form in the summer of '06 and have been asked if I would like to contribute to volume 2. (What do you think my answer was?)

Nix says: I stop there. My brain is overwhelmed.


Thursday, November 17, 2005

hyftgmjfil.i;pgfdstmnx5

sfhmjfgmxmfhk.ghjcvgbc (and that is brought to you by Spawn)

Now that I've taken back control of this blog......

Well, I actually asked the girl behind the front desk out to a movie. I don't think that's gonna happen, though. I'm broke as fuck. But she did say yes. And she's cute as hell. Being on the road for over 2 weeks kinda means you don't get your paychecks. So, I'm fucked. But she said "yes". That's an ego booster. And she's into horror flicks. DAMMIT!

46ukhjrnbku.,789i56ggnbk,trtrewfcwqrhtyjgm (Thank you, Spawn.)

*ahem* Back to my boring life.

Quick hits: Sahara. Ok action flick. Underwritten and over-produced. Fun if you're in the mood for no-brainer background shit.

Shaolin Soccer: Stephen Chow's flick before Kung Fu Hustle (which was fucking great, btw). It's funny but a bit convoluted and drawn out. But worth a rental.

Love BitesqqQQqq (Thanks Spawn) Love Bites: Asia Argento playing a possible vampire into BDSM. How can you go wrong? An interesting premise and well executed. You never know what's going to happen.

War of the Worlds (original): Just amazing. I've always loved this flick.

Man With the Screaming Brain: Bruce Campbell writes, directs and stars. It's your basic made for cable flick, but it has its moments. Mostly supplied by Ted Raimi (brother of Sam) and Stacey Keach. Again, worth a rental.

Nix says: Man, this is boring. Should I talk about sex, again?


Wednesday, November 16, 2005

The Unseen

The movie you'll never see! The Unseen! Thrill! As Spawn and Nix search in vain for Steak and Shake! Cringe! As they drive up and down the street! Horror! The Unseen!

Anyway, we finally found it. Yay!

Well, Spawn and TJ are finally here. Me and Spawn caused mischief. We got into a meeting room and utilized the projection screen to play PS2. Katamari on a huge screen is pretty fucked up.

Then we had to share a pull-out bed. We both laughed for about 10 minutes as we were trying to get to sleep. If you had a choice between Tommy, who loves rest-stops, TJ, who...well, he's TJ, or me or Spawn. I think the answer is obvious.

@DeRex: I'm waiting, dude. You should subscribe to NetFlix. I can't, as I am never home. But you would definitely benefit.

That is all, I suppose. Not very entertaining. My bad.

Nix says: Come get it.

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Patience. I'm Showing Some.

I really want to start commenting on "All That Jazz", however I need to wait for my partner in crime to actually find a copy.

Here's the deal: DelorumRex and I have quite a lot in common and are going to do a "Dueling Banjos Movie Review" together. Only problem is, having so much in common means that we don't disagree on much. So, we've settled on "All That Jazz", since he's never seen it and I love it and he'll most likely hate it.

I know Question and I were supposed to do the same, but Q never took the time to get the fucking movie we were supposed to review. Hopefully, DeRex will rise to the challenge.

BTW, The EvilQuestions forum is now re-named the Den of Evil. But the link is the same. Come join us. http://evilquestions.proboards38.com/index.cgi

Comments, suggestions, opinions are welcome. Let's make this a fun place to go for movies, books, music, and entertainment in general.

Nix says: Do it.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

So, What Did You See?

Nothing much has been happening since I left Abilene,TX. I'm now in Waco and it fucking sucks. I'm trapped in a shit-hole. Here's the only amusing story I have to relate:

There was a guy next to us who was running a great racket. Hypnotism. $50 at the door. And they filled the room with about 30 people. Do the fucking math. The first day was 2 shows for losing weight. (I saw a few chicks I wanted to pull aside and ask "WTF are you doing here? Let's go have some drinks and talk." But I was working.) Anyway, the next day was for quitting smoking. And here comes the hilarity (although you probably had to be here) The dude talks for over an hour and then gives them a break. At this time, I happened to be outside talking to new customers and a huge pile of 30 people came piling out the door frantically lighting their smokes and making a huge cloud of smoke. I was having such a hard time not full-out laughing that I had to go inside. The next part of this guy's thing is playing shitty new-age music and murmuring for almost another hour. Fuck. Do you need a degree for having stupid people come and be bored for 2 1/2 hours? If not, fucking sign me up.

Anyway, I thought I'd try to wrap up my previous blog of strange/ exciting/ memorable/ interesting sexual excapades and be done. (Perhaps) But this may chart my emergence into the realm of bondage and subservience.

We'll start out slow. I have one of the only "nice" losing the virginity stories. Of the many I've heard over the years, most of them sound uncomfortable and not much fun. I was a senior in high school, a virgin and also dating a virgin. At one point her and my friend and her friend all went out to the middle of nowhere. My friend and the other girl were in the bed of the truck and doing whatnot. And my girl, let's call her "Sarah" (since that was her name) and I were in the cab. We were doing our messing around thing and clothes were removed and she put me inside of her. (okay, this is the point where all the guys cheer and offer to buy me drinks) However, I was NOT prepared for this next step and told her I was unable to do what she wanted. (at this point all the guys want to beat the shit out of me) We met a week later at my friend's house while his parents were gone and he and his girl went to their room and me and Sarah went to ours, which was my friend's brother's room. He was a devout Christian. We had Jesus and shit looking over us. I was playing The Cure's first "best of" album and...holy shit. I can't even explain how beautifully clumsy yet perfect it was. Neither of us knew what we were doing. But we did our best to be good to eachother.

Wow, I meant to go into other experiences, but I think I'm gonna stop with that memory.

I meet so many couples that are high school sweethearts. I wish them the best. And everytime I meet them I think of Sarah. What if I hadn't become such a selfish prick? What if I had kept treating her like my heart felt of her? It's all gone, now. I hope she's happy.

Nix says: Okay, the down and dirty shit comes next time. Stay tuned.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

I SERIOUSLY Love My Job

Well, it's not been a profitable weekend. But it has been memorable.

Work: I did all 3 demos on Saturday. Tommy did all 2 on Sunday. Not very good show-ups and ok sales. There ya go.

Saturday, I hit the conveniently placed bar at the hotel and didn't get to sing at karaoke. They had some big contest, or something. I then went to finish watching my movie and ran into 2 girls and we hung out and stuff. One of them disappeared and me and the other one (who I was actually interested in) sat in the car and talked. We fell asleep holding hands. It's actually kinda sweet and pretty much sums me up.

Tonight, Sunday, I got to sing, and I tried out "Jumper" by Third Eye Blind. I did ok. And the crowd was really nice to me.

I had other things I wanted to discuss, but just thinking of how nice it is that I'm not a rapist makes me want to leave on that thought. I really liked her and wish I could have spent more time getting to know her.

Nix says: We were holding hands. How junior high can you get?

Saturday, November 05, 2005

I Had Fun Doing This.

It's my scene by scene review of the new House of Wax. I don't have time-code, but if you have seen it, you'll know what's up. Not the greatest flick.

..But I'm doing something different. I'm gonna comment on a film as I watch it.

House of Wax (the new one)

Nice opening. Somewhat creepy.

I hate every last one of these characters. Please kill them in the most violent ways.

I remember a movie that handled this scenario better. Wrong Turn.

Oh, look! They keep filming Paris Hilton with a video camera! They're so witty!

Be sure to blast that new rock n roll stuff that all the kids love nowadays!

Oooo...beer and smoking. They're so baaaadddd!

Did this movie come out around Super Bowl or something?

"You dimed me out." That's a new one. What is that?

Oh, I see foreshadowing. Good twin/bad twin. Crafty!

Why is he wearing his work clothes?

Just be sure to keep tossing that football around. That's thrilling.

Can something interesting happen soon? Please?

Oooo! He just said "That's hot!" Funny!

Well, safety in numbers. I can't wait until they split up and fucking die.

What the fucking hell? Are they just dying to go Blair Witch, or what?

I'm so scared, Wade. I heard something. Protect....Wade said something funny! hehehehe!!! I actually liked that, Wade. "It's probably a serial killer, or something."

Would you stop with the video camera vision? Fuck!

Gonna miss the football game. What a tragedy.

Something smells bad. My guess is it's Paris' vagina.

Well, that was disgusting. This better tie into the plot, somehow, though.

Yeah, you don't wanna miss the fucking game.

I trust the guy standing in the middle of tons of rotting animals. The rest of you go get to the all important game.

Why would you sit your girlfriend next to the creepy guy?

More foreshadowing! Yay!

Yeah, I still trust the creepy guy.

Christ! It's a fucking football game. Chill out!

If the door is unlocked at a gas-station, do you really poke your head in and ask "Hello?"? No, you walk in and shop, then wait impatiently at the counter for help.

Ok. That's creepy. Bo is one of the fuck-asses.

Oh, Wade. You jealous fuck.

Yeah. Opera playing as he does his craft. Never seen that before.

Now, wait. The entire building is made of wax? And where does this take place? I've seen quite a bit of sun. Wouldn't it melt? Let's just roll with it.

No, no. Let Wade go "check it out". Hopefully. he won't be coming back.

WTF, Wade? Why would you look for a peeper in the cellar? He was just at the fucking window! Check around the side of the goddamn house!

Ha ha, Wade. That was SOOOO funny.

Oh, the exciting urinating scene.

I'm missing the 80's. Flat out blood. Just kill the fuckers.

Jump cut. I wonder if her hands will be bound, eventually.

Please kill Wade.

Take your time, Wade. Take your time.

Please, please, please kill him! I'm drooling for death!

Crap. Not yet. I hate you, movie.

The sun is down. It's dark. Let's kill some fuckers!

She has the keys! I'm sure this must be important!

Wade. You're asking for it. You were just supposed to piss, you dumb-fuck.

Ouch.

Die, Wade! Die! Please. I beg you.

Yes!!!

Or just get knocked out, or something. Fuck.

Good girl! Oh, shit.

She's being smart, for now. But I'm sure they'll write her some retarded things later.

Here comes the good "evil" twin. I'm sure he'll be our hero, seeing as Wade was a total moron.

Ok, that was kinda cool. He got a good "wax off".

Oh, shit!

Ok, now it's...ah, shit. They cranked up some crappy musik! I was actually starting to get into it and they did that.

Finally, the movie is kicking in to gear.

Oh, fucking shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Before, the whole brother/sister seemed hollow. It just hit as meaningful.

Oh, the comedic relief. I can't wait.

Good effect.

I guess the MPAA has mellowed since the late 80's.

All the creepiness is killed by the return to Paris and rap music.

Can we now please kill a Hilton? I'd really like that.

So what happened to homeboy?

Oh. THAT happened.

How you gonna start the car, anyway? What!!?? You're just gonna hide, there?? Whatever.

You left the weapon??!!! Stupid!! Who wrote this shit??

Nice kill, though.

Whatever Happened To Baby Jane is scary enough on it's own. Let's see how they enhance the piece of crap they're using it with.

Shotguns always sound good when you re-load them.

I think Bette Davis is the scariest thing in this movie.

Okay, now bash his head in, stupid!

No, he's not fucking dead. Bash his goddamn head in!

Be sure to walk under the light as you sneak up to the truck.

Convenient placement of a baseball bat.

Imagine that. In a town full of corpses covered in wax, the phones don't work even on the second try. Wow.

Backstory! Yay! Now we know what's "really" happening! Not just killing and waxing people. That's not it.

I bet that hurts.

Back to the room that Wade was visiting. Jiggle the small animal in liquid! It's fun!.......... Dammit. I wanted to see it jiggle, again.

He can find her hiding in the priest but not under a table. WTF?

I already knew his face was made of wax. That scene of the candle lighting was "supposed" to be meaningful, though?

"We gotta go. Now" So let's go down further.

Why would you switch fuse breakers off and not the one's already off to "on" if you were trying to turn "on" the lights??

Raimi-cam!!!

Somehow I know we'll see his real face, soon.

I knew Bo was the fucked up one. So predictable.

Here it comes.

So this is a wax Leatherface, then?

Should I call him Waxiface?

Oooo....symbolism!

There it is, folks! He's hideous!

Run! Run for your lives!

I'm having House on Haunted Hill flashbacks.

Ooookay. I'm so suprised. Thanks, movie. Thanks for not treating me like an idiot. (I love sarcasm.)

Fuck this movie. Some interesting ideas but just totally shit delivery. Fuck this movie up the ass.

Nix says: I'm sorry, Vincent Price. I'm sorry you have been shit upon.

Friday, November 04, 2005

Where's The Party At?

Ooo! Oo! Pick me! I know! It's actually in the room next to me. They gotta bar at the hotel and it's....wait for it......karaoke night! Too bad I don't, exactly, feel like trying to get in, anymore. After work at like 10:30, sure. But they were so packed that they weren't letting anyone else in. Oh, well. From the sound of it, I would sound like a mewling kitten compared to these people. I'll just sit here and sing along to music I could actually do a good job with. That's the only thing that really sucks about karaoke. They never have shit I could really tear into. So it's just me and my cd's, for now. Maybe tomorrow will be different.

I think I got hit on by a mentally handicapped girl, earlier tonight. Now don't go getting all uptight, thinking I'm gonna be a dick and make fun of her. Quite the opposite. (Also don't be a dick and make fun of me, you fuckers. I know how to use an old-school ice-pick quite efficiently.) Anyway, I was outside the demo room waiting for any late arrivals and she came up the hallway with ice-bucket in hand and asked if I knew where the ice machine was. I got my bearings and just had her follow me. We chatted on the way. She was wondering about the pool and hot-tub. And I was telling her that it doesn't really matter. She went to the front desk and I ended up there, as well. And then she wanted to know if I wanted to go with her. But I was working. She was cute. I would have, if I could have. But I severly doubt I would have tried anything or whatever. That's just asking for trouble. But I thought she was nice and would have been fun to hang out with for a while. Hey, it was probablly just that I was nice to her and she I thought I would be fun to spend time with, as well. I feel like I'm defending myself for being attracted to her. I dunno. Tricky situation. Again, oh well. Perhaps tomorrow.

What is it with me? Seriously. I know I'm not your typical sex-maniac guy. Just looking to get laid. I'm a nice person. But if I see somone I'm interested in, I usually do not pursue said person with any kind of, I dunno the word (imagine me not being able to find a word. Shit.), "energy" (That'll have to do). When I do, I fail miserably. And I don't think it's that I come off as desperate. Because I'm really not. What would I do with a true relationship, anyway. "See you in 3 weeks, babe!" What kind of relationship would that be? But I'm not changing my job. No fucking way. I love this gig. So my search has become even more narrow. Now, not only do I have to find and intelligent, fun female who is able to handle an insane person into bondage and master and servant shit. (I'm the Master, btw. Don't fuck with me.) But now she has to be able to deal with me being gone for days and weeks. Hell, I just had a girl want to go out and a week later she wanted nothing to do with me. What the fuck happens when I'm gone for 3? Just call me up in Utah or Texas or wherever and say she doesn't want to see me anymore? Hell, I basically had that happen. Except I was calling her and suddenly everything changed. Basically, she found somebody "better". Sorry, baby. I met him. He didn't seem to treat you "better", at all. (And, btw, I never had the chance to treat her anyway at all) *Nix breathes in and out. Calms down and drops the bleeding flower from his jaws*

Anger and angst and fucking your mom! Woo! Who's up for some chaos???? Anyone? Ok. Just me.

Let's play a game. You're about to die. You have one week. What would you do?

I'd fly to Amsterdam, get fucked up and hire a new prostitute each night until I fucking croaked. I've never paid for sex, but those bitches are hot! And I have noone to spend loving nights in eachother's arms. So down and dirty and rough and tumble nights of fucking it is. Brrrringgit!

Or I might just rent a movie theater and show all my favorite flicks for me and my friends. It's a toss-up.

Nix says: I'm done. Movie time.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Everything Comes Back To You

Can you please make this pain cease? Disappearing doesn't help. Be happy. Be content. I want that for you. But please don't abandon me.

What is it I'm feeling? Thinking? Wanting? I have no fucking clue.

I'm here. $100 linen shorts is still here. (Yeah, it's something only I would get.)

Is it really just my head doing this to me, or is it the fact that I fucked up? This is a messy situation. I'd like to just be able to say it was all mental problems that ruined us. But I know better. I fucked it up. I was a dick. I was a typical guy. I didn't appreciate what I had until it was gone. And I always thought I was different. I'm just like everyone else. I'm sorry.

I sit alone and wonder what I will do with my life.

Nix says: Food turning into a robot that dances.

"You Really Got Me....

...Come on and fuck with me" -Love and Rockets-

Sometimes I really sit and wonder if it's worth it to pursue the opposite sex. It's confusing, frustrating, and lots of other words that end in "ing". I'm not saying that I'd abandon that pursuit for the same sex. I'm just stating that girls piss me off. But I'm wired so that I feel the need to connect with one.

It's not that I've been taught since a child to find a "good" woman and start a family or whatever. I just happen to be very attracted to them and feel I would be pretty damn happy to find one I could spend the rest of my life with.

I don't even know how to get a goddamn date, though. As soon as it looks like I'm doing something right, I somehow fuck it up. Sometimes without doing anything at all.

I dunno. Blah blah blah. Bitch, whine, moan, COMPLAIN!!!!

On a lighter note, I got gifts from my mom and aunt. One of them is a "Fright Light"! Oooo, scary! It's a flashlight with buttons that you push that make sounds and flashes the light in an "interactive light show". *ahem* Right. Here are the sounds available: Evil Laugh (reminds me of a bad movie I once saw. *Looks at Quill*), Wolf Howl (Now THAT one I can really get behind), Help Cry (This one is so retarded it's funny), Jacob's Ladder (That's the thing every mad scientist has that goes "bzzzt" over and over), Thunder Storm (sounds like static, to me), Creaking Door (Complete with stupid footsteps), Witch Cackle (hold on.....Oooo, even has a bubbling cauldron!), and finally, the Ghost Moan! (And, yes, it's exactly what you think)

But it came with colored filters to put over the light! Wow! As the instructions state, you have your choice of "Mystical Blue", "Blood Red", and "Creepy Yellow"! Or you can combine blue and yellow to create....."Eerie Green"!!!! This just gets better and better! The box says that you'll "Be Amazed by 8 specially created CHILLING sound effects!" and that you will "MARVEL at the interactive light show!". But it doesn't stop there, boys and girls! "And it's a FLASHLIGHT too!" Holy shit! How did they cram all of that in there and then find the time to make it a FLASHLIGHT, as well? I'm impressed.

Supposedly there's supposed to be hours of entertainment. But I spent about 2 minutes and was done. Perhaps I will pick it up and make fun of it some more, though.

Nix says: Beef Broth

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Slippery Organs

I know this has been passed around the Juice world, but for everyone else out there, check out the Mr. Happy Face cartoon: http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/185174

Well, I'm glad I was home for Halloween. I went to a haunted house (not true, thanks buddy!) I went to a costume party (also not true, but noone to be angry at) and I had friends over (This is partly true).

As I was slipping into an angry and depressing place, last night, my door opened up and in walked Quill. I can't tell you how good that made me feel. We didn't do much but talk, and that was perfect. Thanks, brother. (Queen starts playing in the background. hehehehe)

As for the other person I'd invited over (and not you, Hizz): WTF? But I hope you had fun, anyway. Because, you know I hate the person you went out with. Absolutely HATE! Burning white-hot hate! I've said it many times. I wish them the most painful death possible. Remember me saying that? Oh, I actually just said he was a prick for the bachelor party thing, so I can see how people could misunderstand.

Well, the real reason I came on here was not to bitch and whine and berate people.

Last night Quill went into the "Room we do not speak of" and pulled out pictures and shit. In one album we found some papers with bad poetry on them. I'm gonna put two of them up here. Run now or stick around. Choose. But choose wisely.

Gift

I'm throwing away my things
Like hopes and wishes and dreams
Beginning, again, with no clue
How to live a life without you

I can almost begin to accept
That distance is all that is left
With my heart and my head still at war
I try believing that there's nothing more

At night, as I fall into bed
With your face and your voice in my head
I descend into the abyss
To escape all the things I will miss

With dark chaos as shield and a shroud
I no longer speak of you aloud
The sun, it must die
Just as must I

So here I am waiting
And anticipating
The time this will end
And nothing begin

The pain, burn away
And peace, come to stay
I'm letting you free
A last gift from me

Oooookay. That was depressing. Isn't expressing yourself supposed to make you feel better? Anyway, here's the last one and I'm done.

God's Little Joke

Ok. So it's real
The anger I feel
I'm hiding, again
I've hit the end

Don't believe that you
Or another can do
A thing to pull my head out
Of what it's seething about

Now it's all about me
Things in hindsight, I see
Fuck the world. Fuck this shit.
I want nothing from it

I'm sick and deranged
So nothing has changed
And I hate myself, too
For believing in you

It's a joke God likes to play
Until I'm in my grave
I'll be laughing along
Until my sanity's gone

So I'll take it to heart
That we're better apart
What a great way to die
Alone and living a lie

So, there you have it. I'm a contradictory bastard. Maybe with some tweaking, those could be better, but they hurt me and I don't want to touch them anymore. I offer them to the past and let them die.

Nix says: Don't run, Timmy!