Evil shouldn't feel this shitty.

Holy crap. I am sick as hell. Just woke up with a nasty cold this morning. Sucks.

@Corey: Glad you're gonna be ok. Sorry I couldn't be there, but my mom and my sister came to town and then...

After meeting with my family, I had to run to the Creepy Crawl, as I had promised to film for Thanatos Eternal. Well, I showed up late for that and only caught the last half of their set. Very proffesional.

So that was lovely. And then I was just kinda hanging out afterwords when suddenly the crowd parted and a female approached me. It was like a scene out of a movie. Time slowed, all the sound drained out of the world and I nearly fell over as I realized exactly who it was.

Mikki.

We exchanged pleasantries. But that threw me over into a weird place.

Nix says: The world never ceases to amaze me.

The Joy and the Pain

Good morning. Ummm...I mean afternoon.

Well, my first official demo went great. Most people were paying attention and laughing and learning.

Plus, I got 2 sales. They weren't big ones, but one was paid in full.

Not bad for my first time.

When I was done I felt like I was high, or something.

So, when I got home Dave (who will be starring in the Loaf movie) kidnapped me and took me to his place to party.

Ouch. I'm paying for it, today.

But I got to see him drink a mix of Jaeger, Gatorade, Jack D, Ketchup, Soda and I forget what else. (You should know the outcome of that mixture)

I've been watching my shorts and here's what I realized:

Spawn's music has taken them to a whole new level. Perhaps someone watching them might actually see what's really going on underneath the goofiness of Eatings and Vending. I won't come right out and say what they are, but there really are some serious points being made in both of those. But to the casual viewer, they're supposed to be fun.

And the other two, which consist of raw, uncut footage have transformed into creepiness.

Avant-Garde

There ya go. It's actually art, now.

Thanks, Spawn. I didn't have time to make credits, but I listed you on my entry form synopsis' by saying: Original Music by: Brainshift. So, if any are selected, you get some recognition. Without you, they would suck shit.

So here are the synopsis' of the films:

Seasons Eatings:

A man takes out his aggressions on his Christmas tree and the tree doesn't appreciate that.
Shot on Super-8 mm.
Original Music by: Brainshift

I Was a Teenage Vending Machine:

The title says it all.
Shot on Super-8mm.
Original Music by: Brainshift

Forest:

A humanoid porpoise dreams of being a devilled egg, dreaming of filming a movie in a forest....I think.
Raw Footage. Shot on Super-8mm.
Original Music by: Brainshift

Graveyard:

Some kinda monster trying to kill some guy. It's the worst chase scene ever filmed.
Raw Footage. Shot on Super-8mm.
Original Music by: Brainshift

Nix says: That's all.

SEE YA, See Ya, see ya....i'm back, I'm Back, I'M BACK

Okee-dokee and alrighty and ok and stuff.

Back from my trip to...wait..where was I? Oh, yeah. Effingham, IL.

Nothing exciting from there to report, so we'll move onto the "good" stuff.

I completed the paper-work for entering the TromaDance NY fest (that makes it sound more complicated than it really was) and sent the DVD via UPS on Friday morning. It should arrive tomorrow (Monday) if UPS runs and if Tromas' office is open. (It IS a government holiday, right?)

But here's what's going on, right now. Troma recieved an overwhelming amount of entries and has postponed the fest indefinitely until they can properly view all entries.

You can read their official statement here: http://troma.com/tromadance/newyork2005/

So, I'll know what's up within the next couple of months, hopefully. Stay tuned.

Other than that, I have my first official demo tomorrow. It's me in charge and Neil my closer. Tommy will not be there. Tony will not be there. It's up to us. And whatever sales are made (if any) are under my name, so I get the higher commission.

I'm excited as hell but a bit nervous. I haven't done it over and over and over, so I'm bound to forget shit and bounce back and forth.

But I'm gonna do my best. Wish me luck. I'm gonna need it.

Nix says: I hope I fucking sell the shit out of this cookware. Let the bodies hit the floor.

Friends.

Back in the day.....(Yes, I'm going into that whole "I'm older than the people I hang out with." thing.)....I would shoot a film and then cut it by hand and then re-cut it to fit the tune. Hours upon hours of work.

You'd think working on a computer would speed things up, but you would be wrong.

Here's the point:

I wanted to enter the TromaDance NY Film Fest. So I pulled out my old Super-8 shorts. I called Yoda and he transferred them to comp files.

Then I called Spawn and he spent a whole fucking day coming up with new music. (This involves pausing and rewinding a shitty VHS copy over and over.)

THEN, I took the music files and the visual files to Joe, who sync'd them up (which also took forever).

So.....what's the point?

I really appreciate everyone taking time out of their lives to make my stupid little movies look and sound better than they deserve.

Hopefully, at least one will be selected to be shown.

Nix says: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me.

Not to go all Quill on ya, but....

...This is just wrong.

"Alaska Judge approves lethal wolf control program

Superior Court Judge Sharon L. Gleason refused to grant the injunction and lifted a temporary restraining order that had kept three pilot-and-hunter teams grounded since Nov. 26.

Alaska voters in 1996 and 2000 banned a similar practice known as land-and-shoot hunting."

"Alaska Chooses Aerial Wolf Killing Over Tourism Dollars

In spite of the people of Alaska voting down aerial wolf hunting two times and the majority of Americans condemming the practice as inhumane and barbaric, Governor Murkowski and the Alaska Board of Game have decided to allow the practice."

"Wolf management may be a fact of life in Alaska but the aerial killing of wolves is not going to go over well.

Alaska is calling it aerial wolf hunting. Hunting? Really?

Even an avid sport hunting enthusiast would have trouble calling it hunting.

It consists of flying in a helicopter or plane until a wolf or pack of wolves is spotted and then chasing them until they are too weak from exhaustion to go any further and then shooting them. Call it hunting or anything you want but that doesn't make it anything other than what it is.

Inhumane and Barbaric Slaughter."

Fucking sick.

For a pic of this fearsome creature, go here: http://www.wolf.com/Info/Alaska_Wolf_Hunting.html

Nix says:I hate humanity and I'm ashamed to be considered part of it.

Well, Somebody's Hard at Work.

Making everyone around me miserable, that is.

Holy shit. Death, divorce, threats of death, depression, anger......

It's like 2005 hit and everyone I know is suffering. WTF?

Sure, my life isn't all that great with all the shit I'm carrying over from '04, but....Damn!

Don't get me wrong. I'm not complaining that I also deal with what they deal with. I care and worry for my friends.

I just can't believe all of this is happening at once. Fuck, what the hell is in store for me, this year? Ya know?

And in weather......

So we are all supposed to be using these blogs to talk about what's really going on with us and what we feel and think, right?

That's the intended purpose, at least.

Well....I can do that.

But someone that has never been to one and then suddenly decides to check it out and reads what affect their having on your life.....I can see where that might cause some concerns.

So let me attempt to explain myself.

Starts with an M. Ends in an I.

I almost thought something seriously terrible had been caused by her actually coming here to read up on me. Sure, being back in touch wasn't the easiest thing for me. But I think she was thinking that it was her fault for putting me in touch with things I had not dealt with in a while.

And I can see that. That is partially true. But any repercussions from this lay firmly with me.

I had decided that I would no longer have contact with her in any way. If she wanted to "try again" or what the fuck ever, I was VERY prepared to laugh in her face, ear or whatever and tell her to fuck off.

But this is most definitely a different situation and I reacted accordingly.

I only hope that if I ever did something to totally piss off people who I thought cared about me, that they would have the heart to help me when I needed them.

I've already lost one, so-called friend, that I helped through so much. When I needed that care and understanding in return I got nothing because of a grudge.

Mikki, if you're reading this:

There was a time when I would have done anything for us to be together.

And now I will do anything to help you.

You were always there for me and I fucked you over too many times.

And we're still friends.

Always.

Just ask and I'll do whatever I can.

Nix

Shall I Bore You To Death?

Good news! My screenwriter for my "serious" film finally sent me the first 20 pages of the as yet untitled film we are working on. And it is fantastic. (Well, it's 20 pages when formatted for his screenwriting program, but 4 pages with no spaces at all.)

I broke down all the scenes and plot points that I wanted and he is now adding dialogue and character development to it. Very please with what he has shown me. Wow. Yet again, someone with more talent than me that can help bring my visions to life.

For years, I've been looking for people to help me bring my visions to whatever screen. And it's odd that I've found most of them here in the 'Lou.

I don't know what I'd do without Spawn or Brian. They, respectively, have given extra value by providing music and good writing.

I only hope I can do justice to all of this talent by shooting it properly.

After watching Terror Firmer and Toxic Avenger IV, I'm beginning to think that if we apply enough effort, money and creativity, that the Loaf project could possibly be a Troma pickup. All the elements are there, except for the lesbianism and bouncing breasts.

We would make no money, but people could actually see our film. And that's the real reason for making it, anyway.

Well, I'm tired. Been up since 8 a.m. Saturday. Must rest.

Nix says: Let's make some art!